Breakups can be tough. Regardless of whether it’s a clean break or a drawn-out dilemma, it isn’t uncommon to feel overwhelmed by the aftermath; especially at home. What was once a peaceful haven is now a graveyard full of triggering memories.
With that, some folks find that the best way to settle into a separation is to give your space a mini-makeover. Although this isn’t a surefire remedy, it’s a good place to start on your journey to moving on.
If you’re especially distraught after your breakup, redirecting your attention is key. After all, where attention goes, energy flows.
TV shows like How I Met You Mother and Sex and the City have perpetuated the theory that it takes half the length of your relationship to get over your breakup. Ain’t nobody got time for that. As you begin to cope, transforming your environment is a solid first step that can possibly shave some time off of your breakup postmortem.
Last year, Hollywood-based clinical psychologist Dr. Jennifer Oeding told E! News, “In the same way that dressing up for that job interview or hot date can boost one’s confidence and composure, going through a breakup makeover can also help a person feel more poised, self-assured, attractive, desirable, assertive and so forth.”
The same concept can be applied in your home. Updating your space can translate into a new outlook on life and perhaps a renewed sense off motivation.
So if you find yourself in the midst of a post-breakup home makeover, here are some things to consider (especially as we approach Valentine’s Day):
1) Feng shui
Whether or not you actually subscribe to Feng Shui, applying the Chinese design laws can have major healing benefits as the thoughtful practice is intended to direct the flow of energy within a space. After experiencing a breakup, incorporating elements of Feng Shui can welcome new energy into your home and, in turn, into your life.
Though many people view a breakup as a sad time, you can reframe it as a productive time. Have you been meaning to reupholster your sofa? Or paint your bathroom? Or fix your creaky floorboards? Now is the time to tackle these tasks. Once they’re done, you will be left with a strong sense of accomplishment.
This physical labour can also do wonders for your sleep quality, which can be especially helpful if you are literally losing sleep over your breakup.
For bigger projects, this can also be an opportunity to reach out to your family and friends for help. That way, your bigger DIY tasks can double as therapeutic venting sessions.
3) Purge (not like the movie)
Letting go is often hard; but it can also be therapeutic. Instead of letting leftover trinkets from your ex take up space, make room for newness by purging; whether you decide to return them to your ex, throw them away or donate them (or burn them) is up to you.
If certain gifts are especially valuable or sentimental, you really don’t have to part with them at all. But the significance of this step is to diminish your ex’s presence in your space and surround yourself with mementos that reflect your current lifestyle; things that make you happy now.
Keeping a positive mindset is easier said than done so a tangible transformation can make a breakup more manageable. Once you’re able to enjoy your updated space, it’s easier to see that this is not an ending, it’s a new beginning.